Your stories damage your relationships at work and at home.
And yet, these stories and the emotions that flow from them are often the source of the suffering and / or discomfort we feel in our relationships, whether at work or at home.
What we need to do to alleviate the suffering, and experience more freedom in our lives, is to learn to go beyond our stories, to dig under our beliefs and to come to what really lives underneath.
Thus, we can better appreciate others, and we come to understand that it is not their words or actions that hurt us, but our own thoughts about their words or deeds.
In her book ‘Loving what is’, Byron Katie describes a very simple way to discover the horrible stories we tell ourselves:
1. Is this true?
2. Can you absolutely be sure that this is true?
3. How do you react when you think about it?
4. Who would you BE without this thought?
Let’s practice this :
Declare your beliefs about money and ask yourself if these are true and if you can absolutely know, without a doubt, that they are true.
For example, let’s take Alice’s belief that others do not have money problems, but she does. When she needs it, it is not there. She has a hard time finding any.
Is it true that others do not have money problems? That when she needs it, it is not there? Do others do not live financial worries from time to time too? Has she ever received any money when she really needed it? Has she ever found it, even on the ground? Does she know without doubt that she is the only one with this type of problem?
The next question is: How does she react when she thinks about these thoughts? Is she angry and resentful? Does she manage to avoid encounters with money, with opportunities or with people who would bring her money? Is she on the defensive in the face of any comments related to financial ease? Does her sense of abundance suffer? Does her body stretch or her stomach tie when she touches money or thinks about it? Does she appreciate at least one thing about money?
Now, imagine that she no longer tells this story. Who would she BE?
Perhaps she would be happier as to money, and the learning it helps her go through. Perhaps she would be less worried with what other people are experiencing, and more willing to contribute uniquely to the world through her abundance. Perhaps she would receive the desired sum, too. Or maybe she would meet someone who would offer her a golden deal. She would probably be calmer and more peaceful.
The last stage of this questioning is the reversal of the statements she has been making so far. Does she express criticism in other areas of her life? Is she herself absent when others need her? Like, her spouse, her children, her colleagues? Is she not visible and difficult to find? Our “stories” often point to our own traits that we project on others in order not to acknowledge them.
Warning: there is no right answer to these questions, just yours. The goal is not perfection, but truth.
Byron Katie explains that none of our stories lead to ourselves. Every false story takes us away from ourselves.
So, who would you BE without your false financial story?
Do you want to show more abundance
in your life and your business?
I will send you a chapter of my book
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You will discover and understand
how simple and easy it is to open yourself up to money
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You may, as long as you include this complete text with it: Marcelle della Faille is an Author and a Life and Business Trainer and Coach who help trainers, speakers and coaches to transform their passion(s) into a profitable and joyful activity, doubling (and even tripling) their profits by reconnecting to the alchemy of love and money! Grab her FREE gift “Boost Your Attraction Power: 12 Love and Money Alchemy Principles to Thrive in Your Business!” here: http://loveandmoneyalchemy.com/free-gift